Stage Fright

Something that surprises a lot of people is that I have terrible stage fright. Yes, it is a bit funny considering I'm a teacher who stands in front of at least fifteen different groups of strangers every eight weeks and odd since I'm a writer who is desperate to get her name out there and get published. I have a blog that I've barely told anyone about, books I've only let agents and very close family and friends read, and a secret facebook account. What am I so scared of? That I suck. I don't want to suck in front of people. I like being good at what I do, and if only a few choice people are privy to it, I'll get less criticism, less rejection and less of the feeling of being, well, less. Having strangers critique my work is fine because I have nothing invested in them, and they reject people all the time, and looking like an idiot in front of my students is okay because I manage to charm my way out of it most of the time. And if I can't, they live all over the world, and I'll never have to see them again if I totally screw up.
But I need to change. I have kids now, and I want to teach them to go after what they want with everything they have in them and who cares if it's not perfect or someone doesn't like it. I want them to live thier lives to the very max so I'm going to do it too. So, here I am, mistakes and all. You'll get to hear my crazy musings, read some chapters of my novels and maybe, just maybe, be able to witness my dream coming true. As my dad always told me and I now tell my kids: you can only try your best.